I wanna read the Star Trek fanfic about all the places the crew “discovers” only to find that a Chabad House has been there for years.

eshusplayground:

eshusplayground:

eshusplayground:

eshusplayground:

eshusplayground:

And whenever the humans meet the indigenous aliens, the aliens ask in heavily accented Basic, “Excuse me, but are you Jewish?”

Whenever the starship crashes on an unknown planet, the main body of fresh water has two parts: the drinking water and the mikvah. And there’s always a mikvah lady. Always.

There is no evidence of a starship or shuttle she could’ve arrived, but somehow she’s there.

There is a theory circling among alien scientists that every human settlement has at least 2 synagogues: one to go to and one to never set foot in as long as they live. This observation has led to a whole new branch of science that seeks to determine which humans go to which synagogue.

Some scientists, after years of study, have simply given up and opted for something easier. Like quantum mechanics.

Some aliens have discovered that the easiest way to keep pesky humans off their planet is to tell them that there is nothing safe to drink but Manischewitz.

The saying goes, “To your usual enemies, send torpedos. To your worst enemy, send a Vulcan Talmud scholar.”