The Department of Extraordinary Lobsters is putting on their Giant Lobster Claws to celebrate the discovery of this magical moon lobster, recently caught by fisherman off the coast of Maine. The pearlescent lobster, whose enchanting coloring is most likely the result of leucism, was thrown back into the sea after the fisherman discovered she was a lady lobster.
I mean, if “men are fucking awful and being with women is overall both safer and more pleasant” were their rationale then I’d believe it, but they’re making it about boners, which is just pathetic.
That’s me and I need a breast reduction. I wear a bra size 32F, something not commonly found anyplace you can pick a bra up for less than $70. My breasts weigh me down, they are tender and painful at all times, and they give me extreme back, neck, and shoulder pain. Add all of this to the dysphoria I feel as a butch nb lesbian, and you can see why I desperately need a breast reduction.
Unfortunately, my insurance will not provide any kind of pre-approval, even to tell me for sure that they would not cover this procedure. My surgeon feels that, going by the stated guidelines for my insurance regarding these procedures, they would be very unlikely to cover the costs, and I would only find out either way after billing insurance for my surgery after the fact. If they did not accept my claim – which they likely would not – I could be left with a bill of around $50,000 in medical fees. Obviously, I can’t afford this. However, if I bill my procedure as cosmetic and pay for it myself, it would only cost $8,165.
Regardless, I don’t have the money either way. I just got hit with a huge vehicle repair bill recently which drained me of $3,000. Given another few years, I could probably get that money back and even pay for my procedure, but that would destroy my life savings ever since graduating high school in 2013. As much as I feel I need this surgery, not only to ease my physical symptoms but to calm my dysphoria, I can’t justify that extreme depletion of my savings for both school and my future in general.
I’m hoping to reach my goal this summer, by the end of August. I don’t honestly know if that’s possible, but I hate the thought of entering a new year of life as a 24 year old, stuck with the same painful chest. I can’t run, clothes that fit properly are hard to find, and every time I glance in the mirror I’m reminded of the literal burden I carry. I really can’t overstate how dysphoric my chest makes me. I can’t even wear a binder because of the disproportionate nature of my chest. I’ve tried everything I could think of to minimize my chest, from making binders myself from old shirts to trying transtape (which would probably work for someone with a more proportional chest, but again, I’m cursed so it doesn’t work for me) to just layering as much as possible. None of these are viable long term solutions, nor do they do anything to address the physical pain I endure. Please consider donating, or at least sharing with your friends! Also, forgive the deadname and vague generalizations at the link – I’m not out in every context and I want to spread this as far as I possibly can. For everyone who donates, any size donation is helpful and I appreciate you all! For everyone who shares, thank you so much for bringing visibility to my fundraiser!
everyone in fantasy novels is horny on main for elves and it’s honestly a travesty like why the hell would you want to marry an elf you’ll just spend the rest of your days growing old in the woods with a bunch of immortal bastards whose heads are so far up their asses they think singing week-long ballads is prime entertainment and say shit like “thou” and “beseech” unironically y’all should be hooking up with dwarves who 1. actually know how to throw the fuck down and let loose at a party 2. will literally shower you in diamond dust and gold they mined and crafted with their bare hands and 3. can sling you over their shoulder like a sack of potatoes with their huge muscular arms developed from hours of said mining and crafting. there’s literally no contest.
This year, on the 31 March, we lost Gilbert Baker, gay artist and creator of the gay pride flag. Today we would celebrate his 66th birthday. Let’s remember him as the wonderful person he was.
Death By Catchphrase 